The Plague of Children And Other Things

I wanted to share a few random things heard in the Bishop Home ....

*Mama says "What did you learn at Bible Study Fellowship today, Ephraim?"

Ephraim says "Another plague in Egypt..."

Mama says "What was the plague that God sent?"

Ephraim says "The plague of children".

(Ephraim had heard the story of the Passover and the plague of the death of the first born.)

*Ephraim when trying to use the bathroom... "I need some privacy".

*Ephraim "What's that spell with?" When he wants to know with what letter a word begins.

*Carson "Can we watch some TV on demand?"

*Carson "Let's look that up..." When Carson wants to learn something... we look online, we look in a great big animal book Aunt Maria bought, and of course we look in the Bible too.

*Carson "Don't forget to pray for..." Carson is always remembering some one for which we need to pray.

*Carson "I did it..." It can be a number of things, because Carson is really learning to do a lot these days. He has learned to ride his bike without training wheels (for the first time at Aunt Maria's). He has learned to ride a horse. He has much improved his reading skills. He has learned to swallow a pill too.

*Carson "Can we read in the reading tent?" He loves to read in the tent in our basement.

*Carson "Can we make...." Carson is always building. He helps his brother build train tracks. He loves to work with Legos and tinker toys too. Last night he built a giraffe out of his Connectigans. (see picture above).

*Carson and Ephraim "Can we go out and help Daddy?" They love to go out and help their dad especially since he is working so hard in the yard these days with the sprinkler system.

*Troy after a long hard day at work and then a few hours in the yard working on the sprinkler system (with a bad cold to boot) "God has given me good weather to work on the yard, I am going to give Him my time now". Troy spent the rest of the evening working diligently on his Bible Study.

**A few pictures for your viewing pleasure too...

Cooking, Cleaning, Company Came!

Long time, no blog. Once again I find myself apologizing (mostly to my sister who checks my blog several times a day) for not writing sooner. But, you can ask my sister, I have a good reason for not blogging.

I've actually been cooking, cleaning and entertaining house guests during my time away from the blog. My house guests were my sister, two of her daughters and my sister's friend and three of her children. Preparing for our guests was actually a lot of fun. Who knew keeping house could be so fulfilling. Troy saw me washing dishes at 10pm on Wednesday before my sister arrived and noted that perhaps we should have house guests more often. Or at least pretend to have guests so I would be inspired.

It got me to thinking (this is dangerous). When I was concerned about the state of my home, I prepared for my guests. I wanted to make it "presentable". I wanted it to be "comfortable". I wanted it to be 'welcoming". I had taken pains to make sure I had food in my home, to make sure I left special amenities for them.

What kind of preparations do I make for Jesus? Every day at every meal, my family and I pray "Come Lord Jesus be our guest, and let Thy gifts to us be blessed. " Jesus is not only a guest at my kitchen or dining room table, but a resident of my heart. How am I making Him feel welcome, comfortable, making my heart presentable? Of course, His presence in my heart makes me presentable to God, but what about the things I have welcomed into my home or heart? Do they leave room for Jesus? Do they push Him to the side? His place is to be first.

I need to evaluate what I give priority. Am I filling my heart with His Word? Am I inviting Him into my day through prayer? Am I turning over my cares? Am I casting my anxieties on Him for He cares for me?

Preparing for guests is an important and exciting challenge. I must not neglect the most important guest I invite every day to join me at my table: Jesus.

P.S. Sad note, my sink does have some dishes in it, but have started work on the towels and sheets used by my guests. Most of the dishes are from this weekend not from my guests. Carson has today and tomorrow off from school, so we have taken the day easy.

Thanks for Potty Training Me!

We had promised Ephraim long ago that when he was fully potty trained (no longer in pull-ups, wearing underwear full time and without frequent accidents) that he could have an electric train of his very own.

Today, Troy took Ephraim to get his electric train. Ephraim has gone weeks now without incident. Praise the LORD! When Troy told him they were going to Hobby Lobby to get the train, Ephraim stood up, gave his dad a big hug and said "Thanks for potty training me". He went on to say "I am glad I'm potty trained". Everyone loves a grateful heart.

Ephraim also did very well at his four year old check up today. He did not fuss one bit when they weighed, measured or took his blood pressure. Not a grimace or a shrug when the doctor listened and manipulated. He answered all their questions and he even put out his hand to shake the doctor's hand. The doctor was quite impressed, she said she had teenagers that didn't know to shake hands. The doctor thought he looked and sounded good. She is a very thorough and loving Christian doctor and we are blessed to have her. Hallelujah!

Carson had a full day with school, riding the bus home with his friend (because I was at the appointment with Ephraim), horseback riding lessons and having his friend come over to play and have supper. He started to melt down at the end of the day, but even in the bath tub, he showed some spiritual insight. He asked me where the bath scrubbie he was holding came from, and I told him I thought it was from Children's Moment at church. He said, "Oh, was she talking about washing away our sins?". To be honest, I can't remember what it was about, but Carson had his own lesson right then. Promptly after that he had a real knock down drag out fit in the tub. He is seven and he did not want his brother to erase his tub crayon artwork. He gets it, and like the rest of us, he has to keep figuring it out so he can live it out.



As for me at Carson's horse riding lessons, I had an interesting experience feeding the horses some beyond human consumption(at least at my house) apples, carrots and pretzel treats. They loved them and I got up close and personal with the horses. I was quite popular and even had one horse try to munch on my hoodie. Thankfully, I escaped. God made such strong and beautiful animals when He created horses. Carson's trainer thinks, I should take a horse for a spin. We will see. Well, none of you will see (ha ha), but I might see about it.

And Troy, well, he put the boys to bed at 8:30pm and I haven't seen him since. I do hear some very content sleep breathing coming from that direction. Do I wake him up or let him have that much deserved early night to bed??? Hmmmm. Well, I think I better wake him up. He mixed up chocolate chip cookie dough last night late and didn't have time to bake it. I better wake him up so he can bake the cookie dough he left out to soften. Before you think I am selfish, he is actually baking the cookies for a friend who lost her mother to cancer this Sunday. (Something I know all about). Troy is just that kind of man, but I have already told you that in a past post. Yeah, he bakes, cooks, cleans, repairs, installs, cares for his children and everything else in between. And most importantly he loves the LORD.

Enough bragging on Troy, I better go wake him up. After all, he has cookies to bake (maybe, I might have to taste test one cookie).

Ephraim's 4th Birthday!

Today is Ephraim's 4th Birthday! He was born October 20, 2004 at 7:22pm. It was a Wednesday, I remember because the youth group met for Bible Study that night and our friend Sean led in my absence. He also brought them to see us at the hospital.

As we did when Carson was born, We gave Ephraim a "birth verse". His verse was Matthew 5:16 - "In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in Heaven." From the very beginning Ephraim has lived out this verse as his heart condition was used to shine Christ's light to all we encountered.

Yesterday, we could hear Ephraim singing "there is a miracle in my heart". He was singing his version of a song we sang at church that morning. The words are actually "work a miracle in my heart". Either way, Ephraim knows that God did work a miracle in his heart. Not only in his two surgeries, but in his love for Jesus. We are blessed to have boys that have responded at such an early age to God's love for them.

Happy Birthday Ephraim! God loves you and so do we!

Dem Bones" - Video on Demand!

We are loving our new at&t U-verse TV service. (This is not a commercial) One of the features, I am most fond of is its "video on demand" function. We can select from a wide variety of programs and a small selection of them are actually free. The free videos on demand include quite a few children's programs and many of them are kid's books that have been animated. A lot of fun to see books come to life.

However, while I love the "video on demand" feature, it turns out the boys think that "video on demand" means when they demand, they get a video. We are working on limits and of course respect when it comes to this. As a rule they do okay though. Case in point, yesterday they wanted to watch a video book titled "Dem Bones". The picture on the cover of the book (shown above) was all skeletons. My boys know as a rule, we avoid things that even border on an evil appearance. My theory has been why give the devil and open door. However, I read the "info" on the book and realized it was based on an African spiritual.

So we watched the video book that ends up alluding to the story in Ezekiel 37 of when God takes dry bones and brings them to life through the prophet Ezekiel. Later that night we use the Bible passage for our devotions. I asked the boys what they learned from the story and Carson says that "Nothing is too hard for God". Yeah! He gets it. He really does. See part of the passage below**.

As an aside, on Saturday we were sorting through some things to take to a neighbors garage sale. I let the boys choose items they were willing to part with and bring them to me for approval. Carson brought up a few of his Christian videos. He could see in my eyes, I was getting ready to tell him that we might want to keep these. Before, I could say anything, he said "But Mom, there are a lot of people that need to meet Jesus". Okay, who can argue with that? Not me, into the garage sale they went.

Nothing is too hard for God. He can soften hearts. He can bring dry bones to life. Below is a small part of the passage, I encourage you to read or reread the whole story for yourself in Ezekiel 37.

**Ezekiel 37: 1-6 The hand of the LORD was upon me, and he brought me out by the Spirit of the LORD and set me in the middle of a valley; it was full of bones. He led me back and forth among them, and I saw a great many bones on the floor of the valley, bones that were very dry. He asked me, "Son of man, can these bones live?" I said, "O Sovereign LORD, you alone know." Then he said to me, "Prophesy to these bones and say to them, 'Dry bones, hear the word of the LORD! This is what the Sovereign LORD says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life. I will attach tendons to you and make flesh come upon you and cover you with skin; I will put breath in you, and you will come to life. Then you will know that I am the LORD.' "

Farm Fall Break Family Fun!

Sorry it has been so long since I posted. We have had a full week with fall break goings on. Below are pictures of the boys on their "farm experience". Pretty cool. Uncle Wilfred arranged for the boys to ride the combine with the man that rents his farm and ours. It was a real joy to see the boys get a first hand glimpse of the family farm. They also had the privilege of spending the afternoon with their great uncle Wilfred who took the time to explain the way harvesting process on their level.

Our land renter was a very patient man that really seemed to enjoy showing the boys the combine. He has four children of his own that have spent their share of time on the farm. There was also another farmer who had brought what looked like his two or three year old son with him to drive the grain truck. I can admit that at first I was thinking should young children really be around all this serious machinery. But, then I realized that it was an awesome bonding opportunity for farmer's to bring their children with them to work. To let them see first hand the way food makes it to their table and how their family helps to feed people and animals around the world (not to mention fuel cars).

After the farm we drove in for supper. On the way we took the boys through the graveyard where my Grandmother Coers and many of her family are buried. I hadn't been there in years and I don't believe my boys had ever been there. We capped off our family time together with a trip to Compton's Cow Palace. Yummm... good down home food with ice cream for dessert. Thank God for farms, family and of course ice cream. Enjoy the pictures.

The Hallelujah Report

In my Sunday School lesson yesterday there was a quote from Augustine: "A Christian should be a hallelujah from head to foot". Hallelujah was defined as "praise the LORD". My mother used to use the word hallelujah for just about everything. For example even in the last weeks of her life as she did puzzles with my sons and myself, she would say "hallelujah" when she or someone else found a puzzle piece that fit.

Doing this lesson made me smile as I remembered my mother using that small but powerful word. I have noticed that we continue that tradition of my mother's, punctuating our conversations with "hallelujah". My boys can be heard using it with regularity. With the common place things like puzzles and with the successes of potty training and school. Today we have a list of "hallelujahs" to report:

Carson had a great field trip to the Ruth Lilly Health Center.

Carson did not miss any of his words on his spelling test that was returned today.

Ephraim had a good day with no potty accidents.

We got our new at&t U-verse service for TV/Internet/Phone. Very fast, Very good picture, Very clear. Supports Troy's "bread and butter".

We had supper with Troy at McDonald's (not so great location, but great company).

Troy had a productive day at work.

I put away a big pile of laundry.

As you can see "hallelujah" covers the big and the little things of life. This idea also makes me think of my mother's tradition of the "happy and sad things" that were discussed around our supper table as children. Each evening we would offer up our "happy thing" of the day (you could have more than one, but you had to have at least one). You could also share your sad thing, if you had one. We do this with our boys. When we forget at dinner we share before bed after devotions. It gives us a chance to evaluate our day and our emotions.

I think we may consider adding the "hallelujah report" to our evening routine. A great opportunity to practice "praising the LORD" for the big and little things in our life. Praising the LORD as a routine takes an attitude shift. Choosing to praise God even in the hard times isn't easy, but it sure makes you appreciate what God has given you. Hallelujah!

Answered Prayers and Salt Blocks

I wanted to let you all know that God is faithful to answer prayers. He answered mine and the prayers of many others as He has shown Carson more success at school even the very next day after I met to pray with his teacher. Carson received a 7/7 (A+) on his oral book report, had completed his memory work without prompting (Thursday afternoon even), did well on several math evaluations and so much more. God is so good. He is in control and I just needed to get out of the way and let Him work. Sometimes we mean well, and yet we end up messing things up. We must wait on His timing and trust His perfect will for ourselves and our children. So, I am trusting.

God also continues to answer our prayers regarding Ephraim's potty training. He is doing so well. Big boy underwear all the way and no accidents for over a week now. He still doesn't seem to be the one to initiate trips to the potty, but he will go when taken and will hold it until you get him there. Woo Hoo. I know that this may not seem like the kind of thing you celebrate much less blog about, but I can tell you that I think God has done a great thing.

My 15th year college reunion turned out to be a really nice time with sorority sisters and close friends. I had a real opportunity to live the passage from Colossians 4:5-6:

Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.

I had some meaningful conversation with friends about what I called not dumping the "salt shaker" on someone. As one friend called it "asSALTing" (assaulting) people. I really valued my time with my friends whom I had not seen in awhile. I know that God works in mysterious ways and in places that you don't expect to find Him necessarily. I heard this week, that "God doesn't need me to defend Him". I agree. I shared my faith without "dropping salt blocks" on the heads of those around me at least I feel I did. I am trusting the LORD with that.

On a side note, I am helping to host a baby shower tomorrow. Troy insisted on baking the cake, but as with last time, I made the frosting. This time a chocolate cake with vanilla icing. I actually put a hint of almond extract in the frosting, that makes it have the extra "yum" factor, I think. We'll see how it is received. I've done the "crumb coat", now I need to go put the finishing layer on it.

Dishes Done, What next?

Got up this morning, did my quiet time with the Lord. When Ephraim woke up we cuddled a bit, went to the potty and had leftover pancakes that Troy had made and frozen for us. (That Troy, he is so good). Then we headed off for music class. We had a "fabulous" time. We ran a few items over to Grandma & Grandpa's for the shower on Sunday and then I took Ephraim to a dear friend that was to watch him today. Originally, I was to have a day out with a good friend, but that fell through. I think that was God's way of saying stay home and do those dishes. Okay, so maybe He has other purposes for this "alone time" but I know He wants me to honor my husband and my boys by keeping a reasonably clean home.

With Ephraim taken care of, I headed home to do the dishes. Alleluia, they are finally done. Of course they are drying on the counter, but hey, they aren't dirty. I am planning my next move which happens to be the mountain of clean laundry sitting beside me. Thank goodness I have the greatest HELP around -- The LORD the maker of heaven and earth. Off to the laundry, no more break time.

"How do you do it all?... Answer - I don't"

This week I had a dear friend ask me: "How do you do it all?". I don't know that I answered her as she asked in passing, but I do know the answer. The answer is that I do not do it all. I do not do it all on a variety of levels. First of all, of course I rely on the LORD for His power and strength. What I do, I do with His help. Our Bible verse with the BSF children this week was "My help comes from the LORD, maker of heaven and earth". Psalm 121:2. I sure needed that verse this week when I found myself in a heap sobbing over Carson's struggles at school. *More on that later.

Then there is Troy. To be honest, Troy does it all. What Troy doesn't do, either doesn't get done or is put off like the dishes that are in my sink right now. Embarrassingly the same dishes I had to hide in the dishwasher before my mother in law came over this morning. The pots, pans and crockpot that I had used to make my blogged about herbed cornish hens. Yeah folks, those dishes have been there since Monday night. Did I really just admit to that???? By the way, while I normally can be found doing as little as I can get away with housework wise, I have been diligent to make sure that Carson has been doing his homework (or so I thought) and trying to make sure bathes are taken and clothes are laid out (of course Troy has generally been the one to wash the clothes). I do make the beds and I have been known to "declutter" the general trouble spots, but folks, the basement is a warzone of scattered toys and kids' projects.

Ugh, how do people do it? I know that I have the best husband a girl could ever want. He cooks and bakes (when he has time), he cleans toilets and does floors when he has a chance. He is also trying to make time to put in a sprinkler system in our yard. Not to mention he works, is a father extraordinaire, and he teaches children in the Bible Study Fellowship program. As I write, he is dutifully preparing his lesson for Saturday, so that he can take care of the boys while I go to my college homecoming this weekend. God has a special jewel for Troy's crown when he gets to heaven of that I am certain.

Back to Carson and me in a heap on the bathroom floor... I had received a voice mail message that Carson was going to require more days with the resource aide. While I certainly know that this is a gift to have her help, I was so discouraged, because I thought he was making progress. I am able to have him do the work at home, but it doesn't translate at school. I just broke down. I was so overwhelmed, trying to decide how I was going to "handle it". As if, I was the one that was going to take care of it. Uh, Sara! Did you forget what you taught the 2 & 3year olds on Wednesday? You said "My help comes from the LORD, maker of heaven and earth". Yeah, that is true, but at the time not even my big sister Maria could completely convince me of that. She said "Sparkle". I said "Not so much". She encouraged, I resigned. Then I as we hung up, I laid there crying out to the LORD.

God reminded me of the title of my blog: Mama 2 God's Boys. Yeah, that's right, they are His boys. He only gave them to me as a privilege and responsibility to care for and train up in the way that they should go. So, I really don't do it all. Okay, I don't. He called me to this job, but He is the One who is going to carry it out. I am not sure what that is going to look like, but I am certain He is in control. One sure sign of that is that Carson's teacher has been in constant contact with me, has been praying for Carson and for Troy and I. She even invited me to meet with her today after school so that we could talk and pray about Carson's struggles. That is right. His teacher asked me to come and pray with her. How awesome is that. I am convinced more than ever that Carson is where he needs to be. Her prayer was beautiful and personal. She invited the Holy Spirit into the process and was faithful to offer Carson into God's healing hands. You don't get that just anywhere. Thank you God for his teacher and his school.

And one last note, I don't do it all, but I do plan to spend tomorrow working on resolving some of the undone projects at home before I take off for Franklin College. I will start my day asking the LORD to bless it and to be my HELP. If you are trying "to do it all", I recommend getting some HELP from the LORD. (Troy is not available... he is just too busy).

From Dinner In the Crockpot to Drive Through

Tonight's blog is simply an update on the The Bishop Family. Tonight was not a Cornish Hen night. With nothing in the crock pot, I resorted to driving through the Steak-n-Shake. I've been looking forward to it since we received the coupons in the mail. Ephraim had his first milkshake and of course he liked it. Chocolate milkshake, what is not to like?

I am pleased to report that Ephraim has been wearing his big boy underwear with zero accidents in the last two days. Praise the Lord. Definitely answered prayer. He continues to be enthralled with the skeleton key and its former owner - my grandmother: Catherine Coers. I am always looking for opportunities to share my family history with the boys. I want them to know about their grandparents and great grandparents. It makes me sad to think they never knew my father and had only a short time with my mother. But, I am thankful for stories to share and for friends that are like family and for Troy's parents.

Carson has been doing much better on his spelling words. We found a great website that uses games to help him learn his words: www.spellingcity.com. We have tried all kinds of things including my version of "spelling karaoke", writing words in shaving cream, and "spelling pie" -(my Mam Mam's pie tins filled with spelling word magnets). God continues to provide the ideas and the patience.

Troy had to purchase new tires for his van today. Special "run flat" tires that cost a bundle. He has been in Greenwood most of the day getting them put on. He brought back Long's doughnuts. Yum. I am hoping that Troy will actually make some of my Uncle Sap's doughnuts again soon. They are so tasty. We used to make them every November for a fundraiser with the youth group, but haven't made them at FUMC for a couple of years now. Believe it or not, I miss that one day a year that I willingly got up at 2am when it was "time to make the doughnuts". Troy learned to make doughnuts from his Grandmother Linson. I think it is great that Troy can share his stories and the things he learned from his grandparents too. We both have a rich family history to pass along. Our greatest story though is the story of our family's faith. What a blessing to have a Christian heritage.

Cornish Hens ...Aldi-licious!

Yum! The Herbed Cornish Hens were Aldi-licious! I loved it, Carson loved it, Troy loved it, Ephraim tried it. Overall, I was pleased. I served the meal with Uncle Ben's chicken rice, french cut green beans with smokies (so Ephraim would have some protein) and french bread. We delivered the meal and ate at Troy's office because he has a long night ahead of him at BSF.

Some of you have asked for the recipe. I did a variation of the recipe that Troy usually makes. I attributed it to him, but the recipe card has his mother's handwriting. As I reread the recipe, I seem to recall this recipe may have originally come out of the newspaper. I used two frozen Cornish hens from the Aldi and slow cooked them in my trusty crock pot. That is a hesitant cook's dream appliance. Really all I did was drop in the birds, throw in the herbs, oil, and a little water for extra moistness.

Here is the original recipe:

2 T. Marg or Butter

2 T. Olive or Veg. Oil

1/4 c. Finely Chopped Onion

1/4 c. Lemon Juice

2 T. Worcestershire Sauce

1 1/2 tsp Chopped Fresh or 1/2 tsp Dried Basil

3/4 tsp Chopped Fresh or 1/4 tsp Dried Marjoram

3/4 tsp Chopped Fresh or 1/4 tsp Dried Oregano

2 Large Cloves Garlic, Finely Chopped

3-31/2 lb Fryer Chicken, cut up

Heat oven to 375. Heat marg/butter and oil in 13 x 9 x 2 pan in oven until melted. Stir in remaining ingredients except chicken. Place chicken in pan, turning to coat with herb mixture. Arrange chicken pieces skin side up. Bake uncovered 30 minutes. Turn chicken. Bake about 30 minutes longer until juices run clear. 6 servings. 345 calories per serving.

The "Key" To Potty Training

We have made no secret of the struggle to potty train Ephraim. We continue to pray for God's wisdom and patience in handling this seemingly impossible task. I keep thinking about the Bible verse: "Ah, Sovereign LORD, You have made the heavens and the earth by Your great power and outstretched arm. Nothing is too hard for You". Jeremiah 32:17. I am claiming that promise with regard to Ephraim's potty training.

This morning Ephraim found an old skeleton key that belonged to my grandmother Catherine Coers (of the pinkie prayer tradition). He had a lot of questions about it. I tried to answer them all. He has been enamoured by the key and the stories of my Grandmother. I decided to use the key to my advantage. Ephraim's greatest potty trial is pooping in the potty. So, I took him to the potty and let him take the key with him. He peed with no problem, but he said "I don't need to poop" which is his usual M.O. I encouraged him to do it every way I knew how but the thing that finally worked was to tell him "he could keep the key if he pooped" and he insisted on some privacy. I left the room and sure enough he called me back a few moments later to see his results. He said "sometimes it hurts to poop". I scooped him up and said "yes, sometimes it does." He needed encouragement, he needed reassurance that yes, sometimes it hurts, but it is necessary.

At first glance the skeleton key seems like the "key" to potty training with Ephraim, but I am certain the key is going to be our complete trust in God's perfect timing and His gift of patience and wisdom.

Pinkie Prayers

I had purposed that I would not post if I did not have "something" to say. So, I haven't blogged in the last 48 hours. I honestly have not felt "inspired" in fact I have felt attacked by the devil. Occasionally, I go through a period where I feel less than useful. Where I feel defeated more by what I have left undone then by what I have done. This last couple of days have felt that way. Like I was just in a fog.

Each Thursday at Noon I gather with a group of Titus women to pray. This group is an eclectic group of women that range in age from 55 to 95. They are like aunts, mothers, and grandmothers to me. They have prayed me through many major life events including my marriage, the birth of my children, Ephraim's surgeries, Carson's school troubles, and the death of my grandparents and mother. This week as we gathered to pray, our eldest member shared some sage advice - She said "the devil doesn't have control over our lives. When he tries to attack you just tell him: "I am God's child, you can't have any part of me, get away from me satan". At the time, I didn't think this advice was for me, I didn't treat it personally. I knew the devil was a real enemy, but I thought I was safe from his fiery darts for now anyway.

How wrong I was. He saw an open door in my pride and he slid right in. I filled my last few days with seemingly good things, volunteering with my sister in law's school program, working on a new prayer program and a few small projects at home. And while they were all good things, I was not doing them for God's glory. I guess truth be told, I was doing them for me. Even as late as tonight, I went to church with my family. This is a good thing, but my heart was not in the right place. I was not approaching with an attitude of worship, but out of obligation.

I stepped out of the van into the parking lot, quarrelling with Troy over trivial matters. I entered the church door like a petulant child wanting my way. I went up stairs and tried to find a place where I could see but not be seen. I sat down on the very last row and tried to sing and worship, but my heart was not in it. I became angry when Carson would not cooperate and go up for Children's Moment. Why wasn't my child obeying? Why was he embarrassing me? Oh my, I stopped in my tracks. I tried to remedy the situation my way and it was not working. Finally, I took Carson by the hand and led him out into the hall. I am sure he thought he was really "in for it". Instead, I put him on my lap and held him tightly. I stopped and bowed my head and prayed for him and for me.

We returned to our place in the pew and I felt a calm come over me. I had let the devil weasel his way into my heart, in pride I thought I was above his working. Turns out I am the kind of person he really revels in. I gave him an open door and he waltzed right in and turned my heart an ugly black. Now, with a renewed faith and a more worshipful attitude, Carson and I return in time to join in the Lord's Prayer. I reach down and link pinkies with Carson. Why pinkies? This was the tradition my grandmother Catherine Coers started. She would link pinkies with us as we worshiped together during the Lord's Prayer. I always felt so connected to her during that time. I want my sons to feel connected to me, but more so I want them to feel connected with Jesus as we pray His prayer.

The pinkie prayer gives me perspective, I must claim my position as God's child. I have to tell satan, "you have no place in my heart, I am a child of the King". I have to consciously reject the things that are not of God and to purpose not to do things for my glory but God's. Reach out and grab His hand, connect with Him.

Like Grandmother Like Grandson

This morning a groggy Carson was brought to the counter by his father to have breakfast. He was really still asleep having been roused from bed only a few moments before. He sat there just looking at his breakfast of french toast bites. I tried to engage him in morning conversation to no avail. So I returned to my task at hand. A few moments later, Carson announces "Alleluia" and sings "Today is Omi's birthday". I was taken aback that he remembered. I am sure I had mentioned that it was coming up, but I don't remember getting specific. Anyway, he knew and he was excited about it. We moved on to other conversation.

Later as I was fixing his lunch, he said "we can have a big party when I get home". Not completely awake and getting older myself, I didn't catch on to the fact that he was referring to having a party to celebrate Omi. I said "why are we having a party?". Carson looked at me exasperated "to honor Omi of course". Oh yeah, of course. My boys are pretty sensitive and honestly pretty practical. Birthdays call for parties and Omi's birthday would call for a big party. We can celebrate Omi's life and thank God for the time we had with her. We will be honoring her with a toast of apple cider, a tradition started by my mother's father when she was born.

As we continued to get ready for school and Carson was relaying a story from lunch yesterday. He said "Mama, this boy at school had a Star Wars lunchable like I did the other day and I said, "hey don't throw that away, it has Star Wars cards on it". The boy looked at it and then he threw it away anyway.", "I saw it in the trash, Mama", Carson continued. He had a pained look on his face. I said to Carson "You wanted to pick it out of the trash didn't you?" He said "Yes, but I didn't". I said "You are my boy. You are your Omi's boy". We all have picked quite a few treasures out of someone else's trash. It is good that Carson showed restraint at school, I don't think they would of have considered it a good idea there to pull things out of the trash.

But Omi, she would have pulled it out of the trash. She was a treasure hunter. She could do things that other people wouldn't dream of doing with things she had rescued from the trash. That was her creative mind. My mother had ideas about things, she had the idea that her concrete front porch should be carpeted. She would salvage larger remnants of carpet and used them as runners. On the porch of our 639 Sycamore childhood home we had two large pieces of green "astro turf" that I remember well. At the 919 4th Street home, she had two pieces of Berber that she had wrangled from Troy. She wasn't picky as long as it was free.

I was never a fan of the carpeted front porch look, but that was her deal. Interestingly enough, as I sit and write this blog, Carson just came in and asked for a carpet or rug. I said, "what do you need it for?" He said, we are making a house in our playground. "Okay" I say and I go off in search of two old rugs. Usually, I would have dismissed his request, and tried to dissuade him from the project, but lately, I have decided that I often say no, when there is no reason to. Why not carpet the outside playground clubhouse? I mean his Omi used to carpet her porch.

The Apron

Today, I wore the apron that my sister in law (virtual farm girl) gave me to Bible Study Fellowship. I work with the two and three year olds and it is always good to have pockets to hold tissues and such. We also made cinnamon toast with our class today and it was handy for protecting my clothing.

Though I have a small collection of aprons, I rarely think to wear them. Today gave me a new appreciation for the apron. I remember my mother wearing a red and white checked smock type one when she worked with her church group: Mary Martha. I also remember my Mam Mam (my father's mother) wearing one too. They are functional for protecting and collecting. There is something maternal about wearing an apron. Something that says you are safe come sit on my lap or stand beside me and hold my apron strings.

My father wore an apron too. His apron was typically a Sap's Buffy classic red apron. It smelled of broasted chicken, usually a welcome smell. Near the end of his life he wore a burgundy Marketplace apron. The Marketplace was his restaurant. It didn't smell of chicken, but it did show signs of real hard work being done. I spent many a Sunday working side by side with him in my very on Marketplace apron. He was so proud of those aprons.

I did a little research on the phrase "cutting the apron strings" and one interpretation is that "It means too attached to one's mother. And it has a literal origin. In the days before playpens and other devices, a mother would attach her child to her by her apron strings. The child could play nearby safely."

I have to say that until my parents passed away, I'm not sure we'd ever "cut the apron strings". It was such a safe place (most of the time) to be near them. I stayed close by during college and never went farther than Indianapolis. After just a few years in the workforce and living on my own, I returned home in 1995 to help take care of my father in his last months and then stayed on with my mother after he died in March 1996. I didn't leave my mother's home again until I married Troy in 1998. Even then, I stayed in Columbus, and we still made time for each other at least once a week most often more. My mother always doted on us, providing us with little luxuries like special outfits, meals out and presents for us especially the boys. Everyone liked a trip with Omi. She was so generous.

It was hard to have the apron strings cut when she died. When dad died, I still had mom. But with her gone, now I am the adult. I am the one wearing the apron now. I am the one that must make my children feel safe and protected and doted on. One of the ways that I am comforted is through God's Word. In His Word, He says, in John 14:18-19: 'I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. Before long, the world will not see me anymore, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live." Or in Psalm 68:4-6a Sing to God, sing praise to His name, extol Him who rides on the clouds His name is the LORD— and rejoice before Him. A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in His holy dwelling. God sets the lonely in families."

So I don't wear the apron as protector alone. I am a safe haven for my children as God is a safe haven to me. I can take refuge in Him and teach my children to do the same. God stays beside us letting us experience life and encouraging us to align our will with His. Do I miss my parents? Yes, of course I do. Am I alone? No. God is with me, and He has given me many family and friends to stand beside of me, some of them happen to be wearing aprons too.